I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Randomize
