I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
