Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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