just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
We got so high we made milksteak
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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