Do vagina's smell?
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
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