New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
