In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize