I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
