I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
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