you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
