Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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