6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Randomize
