It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Dignity is for republicans.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
