If i could tip my vagina, i would.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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