dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
And then my night got REAL pukey
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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