Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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