Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
