I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Randomize
