How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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