Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
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