need another drink. this is the easiest way
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Randomize
