Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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