No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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