Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
being pregnant is like rehab
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
