As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Randomize
