Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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