I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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