Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Randomize
