I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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