38 yer olds are good kisserssss
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
i drank out of a bidet.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Randomize
