Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
