so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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