he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I just gargled with NyQuil
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Randomize
