I want to stick my p in your. b.
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
