And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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