we have officially lost it.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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