i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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