Just cropdusted the office
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
