Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Randomize
