I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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