you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
