the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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