So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
