I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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