So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm getting married
To pizza
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
