every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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