singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize