my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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