its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
