Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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