Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
